emails came solely from Rock and Gunslinger, and the best ones from me. Now we
all partake in this, and that is good. This is what makes our clan so fun!
So now, I give to you a present, from our most missed member....THE
GUNSLINGER.
p.s. Im sending all emails to Dank too, because we know he is lonely
now that he is without a clan. Hopefully, he will partake in our e-mail
wars too! (Keep in mind that these are all meant in fun: WE ARE NOT FOOKs,
and nothing is serious when it comes to us... :>} )
p.s.s This is OLD! Dankbud was still DAA, and Yeti had just joined!
Enjoy! I laughed, I cried, I fudged my undies when I read this!
>To: BMSG32@aol.com, Prdetor17@aol.com, Yanos_a@hotmail.com,
swon@uiuc.edu
>Subject: Witness my endless truth!!!!
>Date: Wed, 08 Dec 1999 09:39:22 EST
>
>
> Attention all [UMDHK]Members!
> VICE COMMANDER Gunslinger here; yes i know you are all
scared and you know that Gunslinger speaks the truth. Why else would noone
evn attempt to reply to me, your master. I am the one that will lead the
UMDHKinto the light, and become #1 in the world, because it's too easy to
be #1 over all the [UMDHK], which i am. Yes, you may follow me, if you feel
you have the superskills that i posess, which you don't, but you can
pretend to if it'll make you feel closer to my greatness. The rock has the funny
excuse that his lack of skills are because he is sick; but the truth
is that he fears that his lack of skills are finally apparent and that he
too is gay. which is alright because his skills match that of the Gay One,
anthro.....whick is the near-bottom of the barrel. THE bottom of the
barrel is the Bioginist, Speed, and 8-ball. You three try to come here and
make yourselves look great, but in fact you shame yourselves in my
presence. I am the one and the one who is I shall never be vanquished by such
skillless things. The only persons that even come within a fraction of my
superior cs skills is Devildog, who I admire for having been able to hack into the
automated ranking system and fix it so he is #1 in the [UMDHK], yes my
princess.....i did find out! You thought you could trick your master,
but you forget that i am the one who has it all.....the skills.....the
leadership.....the awesome power that is GUNSLINGER! You have yet to
be TKed by me, but you don't have to be in suspense much longer i assure
you, the time is near! Stalwartyeti/spanish assassin; Since I, the master
of all [UMDHK] recruited you, you have witnessed my greatness and i am sure
you are happy to follow me and one day you may actually be as great as
me[not true], but until then you must be content with surpassing the other
[UMDHK] members, which you have already done. I see you actually have skills,
unlike the others....and i know you see it too. It is okay to die at
my hands, for noone is really a true match for me, plus it helps all
[UMDHK] in the long run[not true]. Dankbud.DAA has made the announcement that
if the changes are not to his liking in yodasbarn, he will consider our
"offer", and join our clan, which is definately not true. The [UMDHK]
is not a "HANDOUT" my little skillless wonder, you must EARN IT! You have
yet to even kill me ONCE! the truth is that Dankbud.DAA is frightened that
he is shaming his present clan, and now his secret plan to enter ours and
hide his mistakes are apparent. At one point, i had killed him, and after
flipping my fingersign on his little body and knifing the ground of
which he lay for about 40 rounds he begged me saying,"Oh my master! I have
seen the light! Yes, i was wrong! Please forgive me! I WANT TO BE YOUR
FOLLOWER NOW!" I looked to the stars............and then to my team as they
were vanquished in one awp shot by 30 fellow-dank-terrs.....and i said.." I
must kill your team now, then ill think about it................maybe." so
i ran off toward the 300 terrs armed only with my knife. One by one all 3000
terrs shot at me with awp's and each time i jumped and swerved and
dodged all the while swinging my invincible blade. when i looked back down
the hallway after killing all the terrs, i saw one last ct that had been
hiding behind a box. He came up to me and said, "That was the greatest thing
i have ever witnessed!" I then said,"No my little wanna-be
follower.....MY NAME IS THE GREATEST THING YOU HAVE EVER WITNESSED!"
and i was right, and the ct died from the realization of my superior truth, and power, and
his lack of skills. His name was SURESHOT!!!!!!
That is all for now. I will let the truth sink in now, and hopefully
a
[UMDHK] member will grow some balls and reply to my greatness, so that
i may humiliate him with my truths.Class Dismissed!
p.s., this IS just a joke you know[not true], and so are ALL of your
SKILLS!!!!!!!![very true] ;P
-paul aka VICE COMMANDER GUNSLINGER
